Letting go.

Let's do this.

Even when this seems paradoxical on the surface, - how could you ever possibly want anything but happiness, - on a deeper level, there is something in you that is making it so. To transform your life you first must understand what is keeping it the way it is.

The first step is acknowledging that your expectations were and still are unrealistic. Making demands and counter-demands won't change a thing. These demands must be seen for what they are which is not a pathway to "fairness" or "justice". Instead, they are expressions of resentment, betrayal, disillusionment, rage and anger - all valid feelings but not very productive ones. Feel them. Acknowledge that their cause is unrealistic expectations, anger and grief.

Then second step is accepting that you are partially responsible for this situation. if you let go and stop making demands your partner will never meet, you can stop punishing each other. In fact, there will be no reason to punish each other. but if you hang on to your anger and grief, it is you who wises to continue this negative relationship. In other words, even if your partner is the biggest jerk on the planet, it is you who is choosing to stay in this relationship. Accept you are an active player and move on to the final step.

Once you acknowledge that your demands and expectation are unrealistic and accept your half of the responsibility for sustaining this relationship, all you need is permission to let go. So give it. Then with no effort at all, a kind of 'falling away; of the downward spiral occurs as you find yourself moving up and out. Tears flow as you grieve the finality of this action and loss this moment represents. But at the same time, a window opens in your heart and life energy begins to flow in and out again. 

Clearly letting go is not about giving up something. It's about getting something back - namely, your life, your true self. You are no longer bound in a relationship that was pulling you down, fettered by unrealistic expectations, self-anger and unresolved grief. Now unrestrained by chains of your own devising, you are free to become the authentic person you are, reclaiming the joy that is your birthright.

So liberating and fulfilling is this moment, you ask yourself, "why did i wait so long?". I'm glad this day finally came into my life (thanks to you). Rational is a way to be. 

p.s : spitting is not so cool after all. 

Love,

fcc.

:)

I lay in my dark quiet room trying to diminish the endless thoughts that run through my head. I look to my left at the clock resting on my nightstand. 3.01 a.m. I let out a small sigh and look back up at the ceiling. I examine a small thin crack in the wall that extends itself to the corner and disappears. I hear Raggles’s short, quick inhales and exhales of breath as he lies peacefully in her crib. I feel a tiny breeze sneak in through the window above my head and it sends a chill down my body. 

I belive that the mind, body, soul, and heart are all different, and equally as beautiful, yet all connected. I believe in soul mates, a soul does not want to be alone and hungers for the fulfilment it needs and endlessly searches out its mate.....whether this mate is a friend or lover, it makes no matter. I believe that there are more than one "soulmate" but only one that will carry through eternity

I have this philosophy about life, "live life without regrets". Best advice I ever heard was "You either get it or you don't". Life is too precious; it's too short to carry grudges, because they end up only making you miserable. Don't let others tell you how to be, only you know inside yourself who you are, and what you want out of life. For me love and happiness are the most precious things in the world to be surrounded by love and happiness eternally. It is the little things in life that you have to come to realize around you that are more important than material things. They are there, and they are free, you have to just look for them, they are in front of you and all around you. 

No regrets, just love, just you and me.

I love you..

Love,

Drake fool.

To love again.

To love again.

The love of life is, in general, the effect not of our enjoyments, but of our passions. We are not attached to it so much for its own sake or as it is connected with happiness, as because it is necessary to action. Without life there can be no action -- no objects of pursuit -- no restless desires -- no tormenting passions. Hence it is that we fondly cling to it -- that we dread its termination as the close, not of enjoyment, but of hope.

In Everyone’s life there are different experiences; one of those is the first love. Love is a passionate feeling for another person that can be felt in a variety of shapes and size. It was more romantic and emotionally uplifting than any other experience I had ever been through.

I met her when I had my first  Frisbee training with her-she was in the team, when I first saw her; she seemed me a quiet and good girl and I was also told that she’s taken(hope was shattered right at that time). It started one fine day in August. Her name is Joeyee. She had a smile that would make any man fall to his knees (I would die for her smile); I liked her soft voice, her character, her behavior, her appearance, how she thought, her spontaneous, and her straight forwardness. 

It was during w5o5 finals. The ambiance of the game, how she asked me for my pink stool, I can literally draw it out. Most importantly the feeling that was flowing through my entire body was just overwhelming experience.  Prolly no words can ever describe how beautiful the feeling was.  

It's been a while. This has to be more than a crush, more than just a fleeting attraction. Love cannot be won like a teddy bear at the fair; cannot be stolen like a rare painting from a museum in the dead of night. The real love comes first from within, not from anyone else. I’ll wait even if it takes days, months, and years.

No matter what happens, no regrets, just love. 

Love,

Drake foo.

Drenched.

Not going to write anything in this post! Just close your eyes and listen.

I'm no longer able to hold it back...

4 months later

4 months later...

I’m in the boat right now and not sure what to make of this unexpected ‘how are you?’ from you. I feel good; I even have a slight smirk on my face. But then it hits me, and my minds start to work on high speed to process all these new thoughts because you are the last person I can ever think of to give me a text. 

A million apologies won't ease the pain in your heart cause I truly understand time heal all wounds, but the scars remain. Esther, I'm sorry. I'm really glad you took the initiative to text me! It’s been long since I talked to you. In fact, I miss those times where we could just talk about everything and anything. I missed you. I've always cared and there will random moments where you just pop-out in my mind. 

Anyway, I hope that you are doing well or fine by now! I am sure he treats like nobody-else and definitely a much better guy than me. All the best in your upcoming papers! 

Loves,

Drake foo.

Everything Falls Apart

Everything falls Apart

There is no question we live distracted lives. It’s the natural result of living in front of screens. We sit in front of our computer screens, trying to work, but email notifications and breaking news pop up, leading us away from the task at hand. We talk and browse the internet on our phone, all the while Push notifications pop up and tell us of some breaking event that demands our attention. We try and watch tv, but even the places we look for information are filled with breaking news updates and a scrolling ticker at the bottom.

The challenge that we all face is in rightly prioritizing the important over the immediate. While being involved in social media and living in a connected world are not inherent evils, the results on our relationships can be overwhelming. Sigh I always tend to prioritize the immediate over the important.

Life is all about choices, touching others, and being touched by the acts of others each day. It's about who we really are. It's about finding our true selves and being honest about what we feel and what we believe every hour of every day. I believe in fate. It is absolutely important that each of us never surrender those things we feel are right and true within ourselves. To do so would only leave us feeling like we've betrayed the foundations of who we are. Never surrender the honesty of your hopes, your dreams, or your values, no matter what anyone says. In the end, the person you really have to live with isn't your parents, your friends, or those who pressure you into doing things. It's YOU. No regrets after all and no turning back. I'm really glad to know you. 

                                                                          

No regrets.

                                                                                                                                                                   

                                                                                                                                                                      Loves,
                                                                                                                                                                     Stolen heart.

Jealousy.

A jealous husband doesnt doubt his wife, but himself.

Never in my life I doubted you. You told me that I am someone with great qualities, but yet I am feeling inferior over myself. Things like my physics. In another way, I like to compare especially among your friends. Just give me some time.

It is really not easy to face a jealous partner and a relationship can get really tired if one always have to explain and convince the other party not to get jealous. Words will not able to express how sorry I am for this, and i have profound regret and sorrow for the multitude of mistakes and harm I caused. I am s_rry.

It's time to let go all these unnecessary feelings. As I cherish you..





a lot.